Survive (Fight It Out Book 1) Read online

  Survive

  Fight It Out Book One

  T.M. Kelly

  Table of Contents

  Synopsis

  Dedication

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Chapter 27

  Chapter 28

  Chapter 29

  Chapter 30

  Chapter 31

  Chapter 32

  Chapter 33

  Chapter 34

  Chapter 35

  Chapter 36

  A note from the author

  Join T.M.’s Newsletter!

  About T.M. Kelly

  Also by T.M. Kelly

  Books by Terra Kelly

  Acknowledgments

  Synopsis

  My father made sure my life was built on lies.

  Everything about my past was created to protect me. I just don’t know why.

  Former fighter, Julian Moore, used to grace my TV one too many times, and I secretly had posters of him on my walls.

  Now, he may be the only one I can trust and he’s vowed to stand by my side no matter what. I want to believe him.

  My father’s secrets brought Julian and me together–a secret that I have yet to uncover.

  I was never given control of my past, but now it’s time to take control of my future.

  SURVIVE is the first book in the FIGHT IT OUT SERIES and can be read as a standalone. This gripping romantic suspense will NOT leave you with a cliffhanger, but trust me, you’ll want to read UNBROKEN, Charlie’s story, next.

  Dedication

  To Sissy, because Lily and Charlie remind me of you and I when we had to share a room for so many years. I love you.

  1

  “Grab her knee. Grab her knee,” my father yelled. “Get out of there. Get out of there.”

  It was easier to yell the words, but to be in the hold—that was different. My face was bathed in my opponents sweat as I struggled to free myself from a triangle choke. It was the one position I hated, and somehow, I always managed to get my body tangled into it.

  “Shit,” I mumbled, struggling to free my body right as Cheyanne wrapped her leg tighter around my neck. I locked eyes with my father and gave him a look he knew all too well. Then I tapped my hand on her shoulder.

  My body fell out of Cheyanne’s hold like a rag doll. I rolled onto my back and took in several deep breaths and then let them out slowly. The referee leaned over, and I could vaguely hear what he was saying. His words sounded like an echo off in the distance. I nodded my head, but I had no idea what I was agreeing to.

  Closing my eyes, I just wanted to have these few seconds alone before I had to admit defeat. I was tired of losing and fucking hated that damn choke hold.

  “Lily, honey, you okay?” My father knelt down beside me and brushed his hand over my forehead.

  “Yeah,” I croaked. My throat felt closed off after being sandwiched together. “Yeah, Dad, I’m fine.”

  “Come on, you need to get up.” He towered over me and reached out his hand.

  I took what he offered and jumped up. “I’m sorry.”

  He pulled me in for a hug. “We’ll talk about it later.” My dad was always too serious during a fight, and I knew “talk about it later” meant long hours going over what I did wrong. Something I was not looking forward to.

  Cheyanne suddenly appeared in front of me and wrapped her arms tightly around my neck, resting her forehead on mine. “You okay?”

  “Yeah. Good fight,” I said, trying to sound happy for her. She nodded and walked over to her team.

  After every fight ended, everything happened so fast it was always hard to keep up. The referee let me know where to stand, and then the announcer shared the standings. Cheyanne had won by only two points. I had won the first round. We tied the second round. Then she killed it in the third because of my favorite hold. I needed to find someone to teach me how to get out of the hold. Who, though?

  As the referee lifted Cheyanne’s hand, I wanted to sink down out of sight. A part of me felt I should’ve won. Hell, I’d started fighting the same day I took my first steps. Plus, my father is the great Johnny “The Punisher” Adams. He got that nickname after his second fight, which was a rematch. Let’s just say, the guy never wanted to fight my father again. So, you can only imagine what it was like growing up with a man whose nickname was The Punisher. So why was I standing here without my hand up in the air? Fucking triangle choke hold.

  Jake walked up and wrapped a towel around my neck. “You with us?”

  I buried my face in the cotton and brushed it back and forth. “Yeah, I think.”

  “How many fingers am I holding up?”

  “Really?” I said, lifting my head.

  Jake was my coach, but it was only temporary. He didn’t know I was looking for a new coach, well, a new everything. If I wanted to win Bantamweight, it was never going to happen at the rate I was going.

  “Yeah, really.” Jake rolled his eyes.

  “Five.”

  “You know that’s four. What’s your deal, Lily?”

  “I lost.”

  “Yeah, and you let yourself get into your own head again.”

  “What’s that shit supposed to mean?”

  “I know how much you hate the triangle hold.”

  “So, I can hate something and not be up in my head at the same time.”

  “We’ll discuss it later.”

  “I’d rather not,” I said sharply and turned to leave the octagon. As I stepped down onto the last step, I noticed my father leaning against the outside of the ring, clutching the side of his head with a pained expression. “Dad.” I reached out at the same moment he fell to the floor. “Somebody call nine one one.”

  There was a barrage of hospital employees running in and out of my father’s room. I was sitting in the corner with a cold pack over my eye, watching as the nurses quickly took care of him.

  The moment he fell to the ground outside the octagon, he became unresponsive.

  Charlie grabbed my hand. “He’ll be okay, Lils.”

  My best friend was always optimistic.

  I continued to gnaw at my nails like they were my last supper. “I don’t get it. He seemed fine all day.”

  Just then a man in maybe his sixties stepped in front of me. “Are you a family member?”

  “Yes, she is,” Charlie said, nudging me.

  “Huh, yeah, I’m his daughter, Lily Waters.” I didn’t use my father’s last name because I wanted to build my career all on my own. Lately, I was doubting my decision and contemplating changing it back to Lily Adams?

  The doctor pulled a chair over and sat down in front of me. “Has your father complained of having headaches lately?”

  It took me a moment to answer. I thought about the last several weeks. He was at every one of my practices leading up to this fight. Never once did he complain or seem in distress.

  “No.”

  “His eyes are dilated, which can indicate several things. I want to run a CT Scan.”

  “Will you do it now?”

  “Yes, I just need your
approval and we can take him up.”

  “Whatever you need to do.” I felt my body start to shake. “Can we stay here?”

  “Yes, we’ll bring him back as soon as we finish. We should have some results immediately.”

  I didn’t know what to say so I just nodded. Charlie wrapped her arms around my body and rested her head on my shoulder. “C, he’s never said if he was in pain. He would tell me, right?”

  “Well, it is your dad we’re talking about.”

  “Yeah, Mr. ‘I’m fine.’”

  The one nurse with short red hair placed her hand on my shoulder. “We’re taking your dad now. If you need anything just let me know.”

  “Thank you.”

  My mind started playing tricks on me, and I let myself believe something was terribly wrong. The moment I thought about life without my dad, I felt like puking. I ran to the small bathroom in the room and knelt down beside the toilet. As I heaved, I cried.

  “Lils, you can’t do this to yourself. What if the tests come back, and he has a clean bill of health?”

  I heaved once more and sat back on the balls of my feet. “Charlie, I feel it. I know something’s wrong.” I buried my head in my hands and lost it once more.

  “Miss Waters?”

  I whirled around to see the doctor standing in the doorway. “Yes.”

  “We need to talk.”

  2

  “Hey, Dad.” I rested my hands on the rope lining the ring. “Do you feel ready to practice with me?” After a fight, I needed to get back in the ring immediately and figure out what went wrong. Then my team and I always looked at ways to tweak my positions.

  After the incident, my dad stayed in the hospital for two days but then insisted he needed to get home. I’m not sure what he was running home to, but after several terse words, the doctor caved.

  The doc made me promise to keep a close watch on him, but this was The Punisher we were talking about. He did not want me to stay at his house. If I called, he made it clear it better be about a fight or what’s for dinner. It almost felt like he wanted to forget about what the doctor told him that night.

  But the truth was Dad’s CT scan showed he had a tumor in his frontal lobe. It was more than likely the headaches were because of the size of the damn thing. It was hard to know how long it had been there, especially because he had no signs or symptoms leading up to the collapse.

  “No, I think I’ll just watch today.” He smiled and sat down on the bench.

  I noticed Jake walk over and sit down next to him. Pushing off the rope, I headed over to the center of the ring and started to practice solo. As their voices became higher than my music blasting in my ears, I pulled out my earbuds and turned. Dad was inches from Jake, and his face was the color of a ripe tomato.

  “Dad, you okay?” I yelled.

  “Lily, this guy keeps talking about your fight and where you need to improve.”

  “Okay, he should be doing that.”

  He looked up at me with wide eyes. “Who is he?”

  It felt like the wind had just been knocked out of me. “Dad, that’s my manager.”

  “I thought that was my job?”

  Something felt off. “You help and I always rely on your input.”

  “But.”

  “But, Jake is my manager. You insisted we hire him two years ago. You don’t remember?”

  He sat back down on the bench and rested his head in his hands. “No, I don’t,” he whispered.

  I jumped down from the ring and made my way over. I rested my hand on his thigh. “Hey, it’s okay. Do you want me to take you home?”

  He sounded distant when he finally spoke. “No, I’ll be fine.” As he stood up to leave, he turned and looked at me. “Your mom would love to see you. Will you be stopping by soon?”

  I sucked in a breath, unable to speak. His words caught me off guard. My mom died when I was fourteen. “You sure you’re okay to drive?”

  “I’m fine.” He insisted.

  “Um, okay.” I felt a little unsure at my decision to let him leave on his own. “I’ll stop by tonight. How does that sound?”

  “Good, that would be good.” He smiled and turned to leave.

  “Lily,” Jake was behind me. “What was that all about?”

  It was time to tell everyone the truth.

  Rubbing my hands together and clearing my throat, I stood up and faced my team. They had gathered around most likely because my dad’s actions were confusing.

  I took in a deep breath and let it out slowly. “So,” I started to say. “Shit.”

  “Lily, just spit it out,” Jake said. “The longer you wait, the harder it will be.”

  I knew he was right, but my pause was because it was me who had to finally admit the true reality of the situation. Denial was such an easier friend to have.

  “Yeah, okay, spitting it out.” I lifted my head and glanced at everyone’s faces. “Dad has a brain tumor.”

  The room went silent.

  Charlie had just walked into the gym. “What did I miss?”

  “I’m letting them know about Dad.”

  “Oh, Lils.” She dropped her bag down in the middle of the room. “Sweetie.” She pulled my body in and wrapped her arms tightly around my waist. “It’ll be okay, I promise.”

  “Hey.” Jake nudged my side. “So what now?”

  “The tumor he has is too big and it’s inoperable,” I said through clenched teeth.

  “Which means what?” one of the fighters asked.

  “We wait.” I stepped out of Charlie’s hold and made my way back into the ring. “Anyone up for another round?”

  No one said a word.

  “Okay, fine.” I crossed my arms over my chest. “Here’s the thing. I don’t know how to absorb this. Like, it doesn’t feel real yet.” I lifted my head. “I do need to let these emotions out somehow. So, anyone willing to be that fighter?”

  “Yeah, I will,” Jake said, stepping forward. “Whatever you need.”

  That was the first time I did not have the desire to punch my manager.

  “Lily, hey,” Jake said, grabbing a hold of my arm.

  “What,” I barked and pulled out of his grasp.

  “Hey, you’re exhausted. Why don’t you take a break?”

  I don’t know what had come over me. I felt angry. Not at Jake but at the world. Seeing my dad in that state of mind shook me to my core. He’d always been my rock. The one person I knew I could count on for anything.

  As I threw each punch, I let my mind wander back to high school when I’d won my first fight. My dad had been there yelling different cues even then. Every fight had always been with him.

  My body felt spent. Every muscle ached. Yet, I didn’t want to stop because I knew the moment I stopped, I would feel again.

  “Let’s just get some water.” Jake stepped away.

  “Whatever.” I jumped out of the ring and went over to the heavy bag. I let my body take over, landing one punch after another on the leather surface.

  “Need help?” Charlie wrapped her arms around the bag to steady it.

  I didn’t say a word

  “You know, it is wine o’clock.”

  “What?” I said, breathing heavily.

  “Well, you have been at this for two hours.” Charlie shrugged. “I was thinking a plate of nachos and a tall glass of wine might make you feel better.”

  “You know I don’t drink.”

  “It was just a suggestion.”

  “But the nachos.”

  She burst out laughing. “Those got your attention? You are off your diet and have a little wiggle room to splurge.”

  I brushed the back of my hand across my forehead trying to get the sweat out of my eyes.

  It felt quiet, almost too quiet. Glancing around, I noticed everyone was gone. “Where is everybody?”

  “Jake sent them home.”

  “Why?”

  “He figured you needed some time alone.”

  I plopped
down on the mat and crossed my legs in front of me. “I don’t know what to do, C?”

  She sat down opposite me. “About what?”

  “I feel helpless.”

  “Oh, sweetie, but you’re not.”

  “I just know if I stop for one moment the thought of losing Dad rolls into me like a tidal wave. I don’t know if I want to feel it yet.”

  “Have you spent much time with him?”

  “No, but in my defense he also doesn’t want me there.”

  “Lils, you have to talk to him. Don’t have any regrets.

  “I already do.”

  “About what?”

  “I lost my last fight, and it may be the last one with my dad.”

  “But you don’t know that.”

  She was right, I didn’t. I still felt scared to let go.

  3

  “Oh, cheesy goodness, how I love thee. Let me count the ways,” I joked and dipped a chip in the little bowl of sour cream.

  “Wait, try this.” Charlie reached for a squeeze bottle full of some sauce.

  I held my hands over the plate. “What is it?”

  She turned the bottle around to show me the label. “A barbecue sauce. I think they make it here, though. It’s so good.”